A man owned a small farm and was being investigated by the State Wage Department, which claimed he wasn't paying proper wages to his help.
The assigned agent demanded a run-down of his employees and how much they were paid.
The farmer replied, "Well, there's ol' Bob the farm hand. I pay him $200 a week plus free room and board.
The cook gets $150 a week and free room and board. Then there's the half-wit who works 18 hours a day and ends up doing 90% of everything that gets done around here.
He makes about $10 a week and pays his own room and board. I buy him a bottle of bourbon every other Saturday and, on occasion, he gets to sleep with my wife."
The agent says, "Aha! I want to talk to that man!"
The farmer says, “That would be me.”